WOW! Thank you all so much for the wonderful and heartfelt advice, when i made my plea Advice Needed.... I feel so blessed to have such fabulous friends in my life, y'all are amazing!
After gathering a little more information on "Friend" and her mom and family situation i have decided it might not be in Friend's best interest to bring the issue to light with her mom. Jordan has decided that she will not be inviting Friend to our home because she cannot trust her. The last few days J has basically been obsessing over the whole situation; checking for missing things, thinking about things from the past that have gone missing, and wondering if Friend had anything to do with it. J's trust has basically been shattered and our hearts are breaking for her as she realizes that not everyone makes good choices all of the time. Tough lesson to learn, but I think she is gathering strength in knowing she does not want to be the kind of person that cannot be trusted.
We talked a lot about possibly helping Friend by continuing to invite her to our home and giving her another chance. The weight of that responsibility is just more than we are willing to take on right now, considering this is a girl that Jordan ONLY sees if she is invited to our home for a gathering. We did discuss that we think we would be more willing to help a friend who J saw everyday and was closer to, should this situation ever happen again.
Your advice was so very much appreciated. We read it as a family and came to these decisions collectively. So thank you...from all of us.
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16 comments:
I agree. We often want to help others in need, but you need to do what is best for your family. It is sad that Friend is going through this, but Jordan has enough to deal with in her life and she can't take on others troubles. I will keep Friend in my prayers and hope she will find her way.
glad you got some good advice! and good call .
It sounds like you came up with a great plan. I think it all makes sense and that you are doing the right thing for your family. I'm glad you were able to work it out as a family!
I think you did the right thing to assess the Friend's family situation before talking with the parents. While I would like to be informed of something like this, not all family situations are like mine. In some cases this situation could make the family dynamics for this child deplorable.
I hope J finds some peace in this matter soon. It is a heavy burden to have to carry around at this age, but then again it is also a valuable life lesson to learn.
Sounds like a good way of handling it to me. Good luck and hopefully J can gain trust again by spending time with her friends and you!
I am so sorry that your family had to deal with this tough situation and I am glad as a family you came up with a decision.
I think as a mother you are doing a wonderful job with Jordan and I can only hope that when things like this come with my kids, that I can be the understanding mom that you are. You truly are an inspiration to all!!
What a hard lesson to learn at this age, but I guess it's better to know about Friend than be deceived over and over. (Actually, the timing was pretty good, since she's home all day and isn't having to deal with this knowledge and attend school worried.)
that sounds like a great plan!! Just keep an eye on the situation!
That's a hard situation. I think you are handling it well.
A very belated THANK YOU for the award! I love it and am very honored that you would bestow it upon me. :) Thank you for being my very good bloggy friend!
And way funny about the video that says "Jordan" in it! Just let her think it's a girl. :)
xoxo
I completely think you made the right decisions. I'm so sorry J had to learn such a cruddy lesson but I'm glad you are her dad are such good examples for you. Glad you all feel at least a little better about things.
I'm glad you found a way to deal with it that you all agreed on. I hope you can find peace with what happened.
I'm sure it's hard to watch Jordan as she deals with such a big hurtful issue at this age -- but you're right; she will learn from it and realize what kind of a person she does NOT want to be.
I think you made your decision wisely and with a lot of thought.
I think you made the right decision. We have encountered a few similar situations and I have told the parents and was not met with a warm response...unfortunately some parents don't care or have the energy to deal with these situations. I am sorry for Jordan, but it is a life lesson for her. Cassie always has a hard time in these situations also. She doesn't understand the behavior, it is hard for them.
It looks like the pool party was a huge success though..what a lot of fun!!
I have something at my site for you.
Good decision, HolleeAnn and Jordan! I think it's for the best.
Sounds like you all made the right decision. What a huge learning experience for everyone involved.
I missed the boat on this one because of my darn computer, buuuuuuut, I wanted it to be IN PRINT with my name attached, that I think Jordan is a superstar. Yeah, I know I'm just Nobody. But I'm Nobody with a little girl of my own. And everyday I am working to make her be good and kind and strong and all the good things she can be. If she is HALF as classy and sweet and forgiving and compassionate as Jordan was in this situation, I will know I have succeeded as a mother.
I thought the whole thing was handled so much better than I ever could have imagined doing.
And I need to stop reading this blog because I SWEAR no matter what you write about, everytime I read, I crave hot wings.
The end.
I don't know what good would come from telling the parent. Chances are, she would feel "picked on." What benefit would come of it? It sounds like you already have a plan, and a good one, and that J is taking a very mature, common sense approach. You should be so proud of her.
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